Dating for hiv positive
So if you are not partnered, you may still want to use a condom whether you are HIV-positive or negative.But if you are partnered, then that is between you and your partner.I was recently invited to speak at the Women of Wisdom group in Clark County, Oregon, a support group sponsored by Quest in Portland, an agency for women who are HIV-positive. “How do I say no to sex and save face without losing respect for myself? If you get hurt or are in trouble, it makes it harder to be a good mother or friend or parent or worker or even just a human being. The HIV positive partners who were undetectable and had condomless sex did not infect their partners.They asked me to talk about sex and dating when you’re an HIV-positive woman. And then I reminded them of something that I feared might become an issue during our time together – the “I got HIV the good way and she got HIV the bad way” pecking order game that no one wins. This is achieved through consistent, daily use of a person’s HIV medication.Yet the stigma surrounding HIV still leeches its way into the everyday, affecting how we flirt, date, and fuck.“I have absolutely turned down someone because they were HIV positive,” David Robertson says.“It’s all because of fear.” Robertson is the creator of Hope Is, an empowerment center and civic engagement movement in Chicago, who was diagnosed with being HIV-positive in 2007.It’s a way of normalizing, as well; the more we know, the less afraid we’ll be and the more likely we will be to act with a well-informed sense of caution, instead of ignorant recklessness.
And you likely worry a lot about infecting your partner. But it can’t stop you from seeking the love and acceptance that you deserve and that is most certainly out there.
A positive HIV status does not make you a pariah—or, at least, it shouldn’t.
And yet, for many positive people, it feels that way.
“The lack of recognizing the resilience of positive people is draining.”Right now, more than 1.1 million people are HIV positive in the United States; last year, 39,782 tested positive, queer black men being at the highest risk for infection.
Thanks to the increased and focused marketing of treatment and prevention medications, the number of new infections has dramatically decreased, but that has probably led to fewer people talking about the disease, further stigmatizing it.